|
Hot Links: 1ads | Bing | Cajun Life Blog | Ebay | FoxNews | Google | Facebook | MySpace | Rovin Net | Super Shopper Club | Twitter | WorldPace | Yahoo | YouTube |
 |
|
|
|
Back
Woods Rules of Etiquette PERSONAL HYGIENE... - While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys. - Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money. - Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the tastes of finger foods. DINING OUT... - When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly so as not to "bruise" the fruit of the vine. - If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label. ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME... - A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist. - Do not allow the dog to eat at the table. . . no matter how good his manners are. DATING (Outside the Family) - Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date. - Be aggressive! Let her know you are interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the men's bathroom wall two years ago." - Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; Others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it is the boy's responsibility to get her to school on time. THEATER ETIQUETTE... - Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately after the movie has ended. - Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you. WEDDINGS... - Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift. - Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot. - For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance. - Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for this special occasion. DRIVING ETIQUETTE... - Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles; Even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight. - When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way. - Never tow another car using pantyhose and duct tape - When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer. - Never relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving. - Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession. TIPS FOR ALL OCCASIONS... - Never take a beer to a job interview. - Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. - It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church. - If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets. - Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home. |
| Back to Top | Got one of your own? CrawDaddy@cfweb.net |
