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żDid Ya' Ever Just
Wonder...?
- Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp"
to have an "s" in it?
- Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why
some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
- How come abbreviated is such a long word?
- If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed
to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
- Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you
know the battery is dead?
- Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Orientals
throw hamburgers?
- Why are they called buildings, when they're already
finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?
- Why are they called apartments, when they're all
stuck together?
- Why do people without a watch look at their wrist
when you ask them what time it is?
- Why do you ask someone without a watch what time it
is?
- Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
- Who is general failure and why is he reading my disk?
- The light went out, but where to?
- Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds
fee" on money they already know you don't have?
- Does the reverse side also have a reverse side?
- Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of
that song?
- If the universe is everything, and scientists say
that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
- If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving
backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
- What would a chair look like if your knees bent the
other way?
- If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to
see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
- Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
- When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it
a near miss?? It sounds like a near hit to me!!
- Do fish get cramps after eating?
- Why are there 5 syllables in the word
"monosylabic"?
- Why do they call it the Department of Interior when
they are in charge of everything outdoors?
- Why do scientists call it research when looking for
something new?
- If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians
eat?
- When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
- Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a
jar is open, it's not adoor?
- Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll
believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
- How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest,
but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
- If "con" is the opposite of
"pro," then what is the opposite of progress?
- Why is lemon juice mostly artificial ingredients but
dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?
- How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't
grow in it?
- Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get
rid of?
- Why do we wait until a pig is dead to
"cure" it?
- Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we
use them?
- Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments
in a suitcase?
- Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
- Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
- What do little birdies see when they get knocked
unconscious?
- Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
- If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still
have monkeys and apes?
- Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a
travel agent?
- Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?
- Do married people live longer than single people or
does it just SEEM longer?
- I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman,
"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the
purpose.
- If all those psychics know the winning lottery
numbers, why are they all still working?
- Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
- Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower
part shut?
More to come... |
